8. The “One”
Put your finger in the air if you’re the one… ~ Cee – Lo
I once had a man tell me that although he felt compelled to get married because he wanted her in his life…he was not sure if she was the “one”…
Newlywed…you asked for her hand…yet you are not sure that she is the “one?”
How does this happen?!
Now you have doubts…now you are still befriending women, trying to find something that your one does not have, BUT is something you need in the “one”…
How could this marriage ever work?
One of our twitter friends feels that you never know if you have found the “one”…you can just only love unconditionally…
And what? Hope for the best? I guess the hopeful romantic in me refuses to believe this…
Yes, I believe in soul mates…meaning…I believe in finding the “one” who will be able to connect with me and I with he on every level…
In jest, a young man that follows @boissuq on twitter asked us to tell him which one of us ladies was the one for him…I told him he had to choose…
Just because I feel you are my “one”…does not necessarily make me your “one”…
I have already chosen one who decided I was not the one for him…moving forward, I need us to be the ones for each other…
There was a time not too long ago that I was interested in two men…I actually dubbed them #1 and #2 for blogging purposes. #1 always had a slight edge over #2 and the two were interchangeable depending upon my mood and their actions…or lack thereof…
At the time, there was something in both of them that I did not want to give up…
But…
I knew, in order to build anything substantial I was going to have to exercise my options…make a choice…choosing one over the other…letting go of the one that came in #2…
So why is it that people try to build with their #2…their he/she is here right now, so I might as well…
So here is the question that I must ask…
How do you…when do you know that you have found the “one?” How do you know you are the ones for each other…
I have always heard that it is in innate feeling…when you have found the one, you just know…
So…
If you have to question…is she/he truly the “one?”
If I look at you and wonder…surely you cannot be the “one.”
© 2009 – 2010, kelic. All rights reserved. This work is the property of the author as named above, and www.boissuq.com. No part of this work may be reproduced or redistributed, without the express, written consent of the owners as aforementioned.
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Is there really a such thing as “the one?” If so, then why is it usually someone in a 30 mile radius of you and not the person in India? Russia? Sure, you may find your “one” but that “one” will likely be tested by the “one” that you didnt know was there. So lets define “one.” What I would said is the “one” is somebody that you can consider a partner and that you are willing to stay commited to. There is NO perfect mate, but your mate may be perfect for you.
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I believe you can have more than one soul mate…IMO there are millions of people who you will never meet that may be the epitome of perfection with you….but with that being said…I kno I will have met the one WHEN I realized that I LOVE them for what I like about them…and I REALLLY LOOOOVE them for what I dont like about them…..your “one” is the person that u can have so much in common with and the things that you disagree with you know you know you can accept….with that being said…if there is something about someone your interested in that you dont like and you can accept it or live with it then he/she is not the “one”
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At the end of the day…it depends on what you believe…spiritually there is talk of a “suitable helpmeet,” and since Adam only kicked it with Eve…that is how some choose to see it.
I still think that the concept of the one is very valid; however, NO ONE I EVER thought was THE ONE was…so perhaps its not a decision that we should make anyway–oops! That might have been a bit Divine…
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Lifes Profylactic Reply:
November 3rd, 2009 at 11:36 am
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@msgoodigoodi, i concur with your last statement
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keli Reply:
November 3rd, 2009 at 2:16 pm
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Agreed…
but…
Unlike Adam and Eve…we are not the only man and woman standing…and many times there are other’s standing in the way, because we have allowed them to be in the way…our spiritual eyes are not always open or always seeing clearly…thus why we end up choosing someone who is clearly not the one…and of course, seeing clearly too often is in hindsight.
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msgoodigoodi Reply:
November 3rd, 2009 at 2:55 pm
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@keli, Where the heck did you come from (smile)!? Well…perhaps we need to keep our eyes open until he and I are the last ones standing (so to speak)…you said that if we’re still wondering–even wandering–then that person is probably NOT “the one,” yes?
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kelic Reply:
November 3rd, 2009 at 9:06 am
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@Jenks,
And even with that definition of the “one” there are still those that settle for “the one right now.”
Why? if this person does not embody what you need in a mate…in your partner…then why try to force it…why make the the “one?”
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msgoodigoodi Reply:
November 3rd, 2009 at 11:31 am
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@kelic, That makes me think of the finale of Daisy of Love. Daisy told the the two men before that you’re what I need (TJ) but you’re what I want (London)…she chose, and I sure that had its own set of consequences. Sometimes its not settling to them, but then it doesn’t work out and everyone is all shock and appauled…
But you know you 2 like to go at it, so I’m leaving this thread alone.
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