Max-Logic.com posed a simple yet interesting question in one of her recent blogs: Are You Stupid? A quote from that post:
“The problem is of course that the vast majority of people who want to talk to me about their relationship woes are women. And the problem with women is that when it comes to relationships they are largely….stupid.”
In contrast, on my Twitter account (@WisdomIsMisery) I wondered if women are stupid, emotionally driven or hopelessly optimistic? This is not to say the three can’t be equated or result in the same outcome. As a man I cannot say if women are stupid. Besides, it’s different from woman to woman but I will say women tend to do things I do not understand.
For instance, I’m talking (although we may no longer be talking as of the date of this posting) to a woman whom I told from the very beginning I was not looking for anything serious. We did what we had to do for a few months, which is a politically correct way of saying we were basically friends with benefits, when suddenly, but not unexpectedly, she asked me where this “relationship” was going? I re-informed her, in so many words, that it wasn’t going anywhere. She became upset.
Now I could retell this story a thousand different ways with a hundred different women but the theme is always the same: I tell women “A” she hears “A” but expects and plans for “Z”. This begs two questions: 1) one of which is the theme of this blog, Are Women Stupid? Or 2) Are men responsible for accounting for the future expectations of women even if they tell them the truth from the beginning?
I am of the belief that if I provide you all the facts that you need to make a sound, logical and basically grown up decision, then my responsibility ends there. In other words, if I say I’m not looking for anything serious and you are and you decide to date me anyway – and then things don’t work out as you imagined – then that is your fault, not mine. Also referred to as “your bad.”
However, I recognize a lot of women tend to let men dictate the relationship because that’s the status quo. I think this is flawed myself but apparently, I am in the minority. Maybe it’s because I’m a man. I’m not even saying women have to become the dominant sex more than I’m saying if that is not the role you are going to play, then you should at least wisely choose the type of men you will let into your heart, among other places.
I guess that brings us full circle. What do you think? Are women stupid? If a woman submits the direction of the relationship to the man, does he by the very nature of this role then bear more responsibility for accounting for his and her feelings regardless of if he tells her there is no future relationship guarantee? Let me put it like this:
Most men are not out to blatantly do women wrong. They are, however, opportunist. If he tells you he’s not looking for a relationship but you continue to call… He will answer. If you continue you to open your legs… He will get in between them. Everything is lackadaisical and care free, until you try to get him into a relationship. Suddenly he begins to refer back to his original disclaimer that he is not looking for a relationship despite all the relationship things you thought you two were already participating in, minus the title of course.
Obviously, someone in this equation needs to make an adjustment…
© 2013, guest author. All rights reserved. This work is the property of the author as named above, and www.boissuq.com. No part of this work may be reproduced or redistributed, without the express, written consent of the owners as aforementioned.