boissuq replay: Two Roses
“If only he’d realize just how great we would be together,” I can hear her saying the words, can’t you?
Hasn’t every woman said these words?
Haven’t we all met a guy that brought so much to the table–or so we thought. He’s got the good looks, the great job, and of course, a dash of ambition. However, for all his pros, he has one enormous con: he does not want you.
Well, let’s put that a different way…
He does want you, right up until the point where a commitment would be required. He has no problem with you being down for him; there for him; or anything else, “for him.” I do not have to list them, we all know all the things we do when we want him to know how great we would be for him.
And, in the midst of it all–he shows up.
Who is he?
Glad you asked.
He is the man that is beautiful and sweet. He speaks wonderful words and answers EVERY TIME you call. Everything that you have ever wanted from the other man, you have now found in another man.
Figures…
And, the truth is that for all of his wonderful gestures and sweet words, he has got a few more “cons” than the man you have attempted to woo for months (and some, for years).
Job? Nope.
Car? Nuh-uh.
Yes, it is true. He has almost nothing but the drive and the desire to do better, and it is okay because you know he cannot be anything but your friend–there is no future in this.
We all saw “Disappearing Acts…”
But, it is okay…it’s fine…it’s all good–we have got everything in perspective and under control.
In fact, everything is okay until your friend hands you two roses (bought with the money you know he does not have) and looks deeply into your eyes with 6 words that you have NEVER heard spoken so sincerely:
“I want to be with you.”
Damn.
© 2010, msgoodigoodi. All rights reserved. This work is the property of the author as named above, and www.boissuq.com. No part of this work may be reproduced or redistributed, without the express, written consent of the owners as aforementioned.
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It’s funny how love and commitment are usually always mentioned with finance and material things. Sometimes people unintentionally sabotage the best thing for themselves and it’s all because of what “society” has taught you to require from your partner. Yes you may be ashamed of the guy with two roses, you likely wouldn’t want to mention his financial status with your friends or family due to embarrassment. What happens when you choose the financially stable choice only to soon realize that the love and undying loyalty is far less present than in your peasant suitor? Then the well runs dry and heartbreak appears. Tell me what’s more embarrassing and will society be there to heal that pain?
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@kelic, the idea of love can give anyone hope. That’s the kind of support that shows the human condition of the heart. when all someone has is hope- an inner faith that sees beyond the present circumstances, what does taking that away hope do to them?
@msgoodigoodi, you mentioned a “drive and desire to do better” that delivers individual interpretation. your definition of “better” can alter your idea of what “better” is.
….but does your definition of better line up with your purpose…. (I’ll save that for another topic)
In his eyes you have ultimately lifted his spirit by showing all the qualities that he has searched for, prayed for, dreamed of… so he does desire something better– in YOU.
Shocking…. I know.
@thehoodnerd “love and commitment usually mentioned with finance and material things”— and for good reason. stepping up on the female soap box- at the point when she has seen the good in a man that makes her feel safe, wanted, loved, appreciated, respected— that lines up the potential of someone she would be willing to make a life commitment.
Women cannot walk into a situation not understanding the true circumstances. A woman looking at the scope of the situation will determine the decision— and that’s a smart woman.
a man without a job and without a car does something ill to his confidence as a “man”. It’s not the easiest place to be. I’ve seen it. It takes a toll on the very nature of his being to be a provider.
It’s an emotional risk she must be willing to take to support his fragile state… but is it worth it? maybe.
In the same respect of being a provider. That’s not society telling us to require in a partner. God put Adam in the Garden and told him to take care of it. When a woman takes a man’s name, she becomes his responsibility. Jacob worked for 14 year to have Rachel as his wife. If society is dictating how you develop relationships, you may want to find a new perspective. Society has distorted the truth and value of “real” relationships. At what point did men and women stop building friendships before they stepped into committed relationships?
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msgoodigoodi Reply:
January 16th, 2010 at 12:16 pm
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actually its not my story…so while i would love to expound on that, i’m writing from “hearsay” so i just don’t know what the right response would be.
that being said…thank you for your candor, i always enjoi your comments.
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kelic Reply:
January 15th, 2010 at 7:57 am
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How things look on the outside too often plays a part in our decisions…
yet, it also depends upon why is he out of work…if it’s from lack of trying, this trumps all the good.
But the interesting thing is, it always seems that the men that do not have “it” together, are always the quickest to approach and try to court a woman. I guess love may be the only thing they have…or the idea of love gives them hope?
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